I did not expect for things to go so slowly and quickly at the same time. I am surprised we’re already looking at our third try next month, while at the same time feeling like we’ve been doing this for a loooong time.
I did not expect for Nutella to get such strong pregnancy symptoms after each IUI and then…not be pregnant. She’s had symptoms she’s never had before that clearly point to “pregnant” but then BFN. It’s strange and confusing, but recently I’ve come to find out she is not alone. Some women have said they had pregnancy symptoms with many failed cycles, and for the one that worked they hardly had any symptoms. So now I’m writing off symptoms- screw you, symptoms, I don’t trust you anymore!
I didn’t expect to become so obessive, excited to see what each new BBT is every morning and practically memorizing charts from Fertility Friend. I didn’t expect to become quite so invested either. Oh sure, I knew I was going to be involved, but not to the Nth degree. It’s surprised me for sure.
We are still hopeful, but my naivetivity has given way to cynicism…or is it realism? Whatever it is, it’s been eye-opening- and that’s not necessarily a bad thing.